It was my birthday last weekend, and every year on my birthday two things always happen: I get a stinking cold and the weather goes to shit. For some reason, this didn't deter me from booking a half marathon that fell on my actual birthday or being surprised when I proceeded to get a stinking … Continue reading Littlehampton parkrun and Worthing Half
Back in 2016, I ran a PB at the Brighton Half Marathon, and then six weeks later I ran the Reading Half Marathon. Between those events I tripped over a wonky paving stone outside Higham Hill Park and broke a rib. Consequently, I did not replicate my success of Brighton 2016 at Reading 2016. Or … Continue reading Reading Half Marathon 2024
Had you asked me ten years ago what I wanted most for myself, I would have told you that I wanted the return of my no-good, cheating, lying, conning boyfriend. Well, maybe I wouldn't have admitted it to you, but that was the truth. Toxic relationships work like that, there's an addictive quality, where you … Continue reading Brighton Half Marathon 2024
If you have any interest in parkrun, you'll probably have noticed the furore surrounding the recent deletion of all course records and the "Most Events Table" from the parkrun website. parkrun have issued a statement saying this is to make a more "inclusive" atmosphere and encourage slow runners and walkers to join in. They believe … Continue reading A slow runner’s view of the parkrun course records saga
Last weekend featured a trip to Aldenham parkrun, which is located somewhere between Borehamwood and Watford in a country park round a reservoir. It is a bit of a hike from London but by now any parkrun that meets everyone's suitability requirements (me: not grass, most other people: not a repeat, everyone: can actually get … Continue reading Aldenham parkrun
This week I reached the momentous milestone of 100 different parkrun venues. This is known as a "Cowell" to hardcore parkrun tourists (after Mr Cowell, the first person to achieve the milestone - not Simon Cowell btw) but I prefer to just call it my 100th different venue so people who aren't parkrun tourists have … Continue reading Church Mead parkrun
My first parkrun since my bottom injection, and can you guess what happens? Two days before parkrunday, I go out to see The Cure in Italy like the sad old goth I am, get absolutely trolleyed on cocktails with names like Paris Hilton and Julia's Strap On, and fall flat on my face, too drunk … Continue reading Farfalle parkrun
I've not written on this blog for a while because a) every time I started writing it came out as self pitying blurb that was definitely not funny and of no entertainment value to anyone b) sitting on my ancient computer chair to write them was too painful (there are a few half finished draft … Continue reading Back
What happens when you're doing your best running in years and are on the brink of smashing that six year old PB? You get injured of course. I have developed a literal pain in the bum, otherwise known as piriformis syndrome. I don't know why I have this as I have not been doing anything … Continue reading Crane parkrun and Hackney Half
The trouble with pouring your heart and soul into your half marathon training and not falling over or catching Corona in the days before is that you find yourself on the start line an absolute bag of nerves with no excuses for failure. There's no "well, I would have done better if I had trained … Continue reading Brighton Half Marathon 2022
After starting 2022 in my usual catastrophic fashion and flunking RED January at 9:20 on January 1st, I decided to try again with RED February. As February is a bit shorter than January I decided to start a bit early, on 22nd January, and therefore as of today I have run thirty days in a … Continue reading RED FEB
Half Marathon training is well underway which is a good thing because I have already booked five for this year and it's only February. I can't work out if it is going well or not. On one hand, I seem to be able to run long distances very comfortably (no lying on floor groaning when … Continue reading Harrow parkrun
On Friday I had one of my bright ideas. These never end well. The bright idea in question was to do my long run on the running track. I thought this was a good idea because a) it was New Year's Eve and surely no one else would be there b) if something started to … Continue reading Sunny Hill parkrun
Isabel Trail, Stafford, 13 November 2021 Finally I'm in good form, the weather is kind, it's a perfect course (a flat out and back on a disused railway line). I'm going all out for a PB. I don't even care that I have a half marathon the next day because we all know I'm never … Continue reading A Tale of Three parkruns
In three weeks and three days I am doing a triathlon. Considering I signed up for it on 23rd November 2018, nearly three years ago, you can hardly say this has been sprung on me, yet I still feel completely incompetent. Perhaps this is because I have had so many events cancelled that I am … Continue reading I just can’t wait to become a triathlete!
Last week, we had an outbreak of the other kind of weather. Hot, sunny, weather. Finally, it was time to turn off the heating, take off the woolly socks and go swimming without worrying about how I would get the feeling back in my fingers afterwards. The only problem with hot, sunny weather is that … Continue reading Clapham Common Chase the Sun
The Hertfordshire Half is to half marathons what Sunny Hill is to parkrun. Featuring hills, undulations, slopes, mounds, mounts, hummocks, bumps, heights, ascents, inclines and gradients, the only thing you can say for it is that there is no mud. (Except for that bit in the second kilometre where you have to go round a … Continue reading Hertfordshire Half Marathon
Thought I had better post something to confirm that I am still alive and have not given up running (or blogging). Recently there has been a deluge of races as everything that was postponed over the last six months finally stopped being postponed, leading to comedy moments such as me opening my post and realising … Continue reading Still Alive
My first half back could have gone better, to say the least. The problems started pretty much as soon as I arrived at the racecourse and discovered that there was no queue for the women's toilets because apparently the vast majority of the entrants were men (378 men and 101 women according to the results … Continue reading Aintree Half
About a year ago I shelled out TWO HUNDRED QUID for a top level running gadget called a Stryd. This little footpod promises to deliver laser smart precision running dynamics data, facilitate power based training and - most importantly for me - deliver far more accurate distance data than GPS. Great, I thought, no more … Continue reading Stryd Wind: disappointed customer
The St Albans 10k was great and everything, but for me it didn't really feel like races were back until I'd done a RunThrough race! And the first back for me was one of my favourites, Chase the Sun at the Olympic Park. Even though I'm not normally an evening runner, I do really like … Continue reading Chase the Sun Olympic Park
For the tenth (I think) time in the last year, I find myself horrified by the fact that I have a half marathon to run that looks like it isn't going to be cancelled. It's worth mentioning that every single one of those half marathons have been cancelled in the end, some with just days … Continue reading Ouch
And therefore after this post I will only post about running. I won't go as far to say that I will never mention The Corona again, but I'm sick of talking about it, and sick of adding a caveat about not knowing what will happen next to everything I dare to wish or plan for. … Continue reading This is a running blog
The moment I set eyes on Mark Keds for the first time was the moment I knew categorically that I was not a lesbian. I was fifteen years old and saw this picture of his band, the Senseless Things, in the NME. Mark Keds, standing with the sun in his face and the wind in … Continue reading Mark Keds
Random bleakness from today's run. It's all gone a bit Leyton Orient. Last week I ran my fastest 10k race (1:10:14) on Saturday, my second fastest ever half marathon as a training run on Monday (2:42:24) and equalled my 5k PB on Wednesday (33:53) despite being knackered and having a bit of a hangover. I … Continue reading Two nil up at half time…
One event that I had planned for 2020 that didn't get cancelled was Dock2Dock, the annual swimming race in my favourite swimming spot, Victoria Dock. The race has three options: 1.5k, 5k and 10k, and takes you all the way from the usual course under the Unreasonably High Footbridge, under Connaught Bridge into the next … Continue reading Dock2Dock
The last six months have been like the worst marathon you can possibly imagine. Six laps of Shoreham Power Station. On the first lap everyone was stealing the toilet paper from the portaloos and stockpiling the finish water. On the second lap, loads of the runners died and you had dodge the dead bodies. On … Continue reading RunThrough Battersea 10k
For the next week, I will be running 5km every day in memory of a black person who died too soon, writing a story biography of that person on this blog, and making a donation to a relevant charity. My first run is in memory of Stephen Lawrence. I am writing about Stephen first because … Continue reading #BLM day one: Stephen Lawrence
Pymmes parkrun is the second closest to my flat and the third different parkrun that I attended (after Finsbury Park and Hackney Marshes). Despite it's proximity I haven't been back since that solitary visit nearly three years ago and you might be forgiven for thinking that it was a horrible and unsuitable parkrun. This is … Continue reading Pymmes parkrun
When I returned from Chalkwell Beach parkrun, I failed to notice the large white envelope that had plopped through my letterbox in my absence. I failed to notice it until the next morning, just after I had finished ringing work to tell them that I was very sorry but my cold had turned into a … Continue reading Evicted in a Epidemic
If I were still writing my work blog, I would have given you an insightful piece about the thrills of working for the ambulance service during a pandemic, how the reaction of the public, press and government is doing far more damage than the disease itself, how at least twenty people who have no relevant … Continue reading Chalkwell Beach parkrun
Quick post because I'm off out to football (not cancelled this week) and have very little time! On Sunday I made it to the Berkhamsted 5 Mile "Fun Run" which, despite the sexist and non snail friendly announcer person, was a nice race. It was quite a challenging course with a full mile of uphill … Continue reading Coronavirus Rigidus
My Facebook feed was full of posts about the Brighton Half Marathon yesterday, which means my half marathon PB is now a mammoth four years old. It's past the toddler stage and soon it will be going to school, and before you know it, it'll be up and away and gone to university and then … Continue reading Limp
It's been a hard weekend. On Saturday I heard the very sad news that my friend Flash had died. I "met" her on the Livejournal group The Ladies Loos about fifteen years ago and she was very kind to me when all that bollocks happened with that horrible ex I mention from time to time. … Continue reading Valentines parkrun (again)
Chase the Moon Olympic Park 12th February 2020 - 35:06. My slowest run at this venue for god knows how long. I ran as fast as I could but I didn't even feel out of breath. My legs can no longer keep up with me. I am feeling very down at the state of my … Continue reading Wankle Woe
The Ladies' Pond on Hampstead Heath is a funny place. It reminds me of one of those impressionist paintings, full of women in a state of undress frolicking in a meadow and basking in a semi-delirious state of joie de vivre. I have mostly only visited in summer before, where the queue to get in … Continue reading The Ladies’ Pond
In a great week for running, where Eliud Kipchoge ran the first ever sub 2 hour marathon distance, and Brigid Kosgei smashed the women's marathon record in Chicago, I am sorry to say that I have completely failed to make my own contribution. Last Wednesday saw the first Olympic Park Chase The Moon of the … Continue reading 1:59:40
A quick post from my phone to say that I am taking part in "Plastic Free July". I do love a monthly challenge and the impact of plastic on the environment is something I'm becoming increasingly aware of. When you go vegan, you suddenly find your habits under scrutiny and even if you didn't go … Continue reading Plastic Free July
Somehow I managed to get myself talked into doing a Category A Fell race in Epping Forest. Category A Fell Races are as dangerous as Category A prisoners and Category A drugs. They must have at least 50m of climb per km (this one had more) and no more than 20% of the course on … Continue reading Fell Race
It's all kicked off now. Liz, the 7.5 hour London Marathon pacer, has been on several TV and radio news programme and appeared in the national and international press talking about the appalling treatment of slower participants. I've gathered together a few links if you want to fill yourself in: Liz's blog - Marathon Queen … Continue reading Back of the Pack Fight Back
I'll start this post with a quick parkrun round-up: Saturday was my third visit to Hampstead Heath, this time for the B course which is very similar to the A course but with a slightly harder "tail" section with trailier trails and steeper hills - it also finishes significantly higher than it starts. I was … Continue reading The London Marathon: not for snails
Last night was the final Chase the Moon of the season, as the moon will be in retirement for the summer and allowing THE SUN to be chased instead! I am so excited by this, Chase the Sun is the highlight of my summer. I love turning up every week and seeing my running buddies … Continue reading RunThrough Chase the Moon Olympic Park (for the fifty millionth time)
Now! The writing's on the wall It won't go away It's an omen You just run on automation I've always had mixed feelings about The Prodigy's music. When they first came to fame in the early 90s, I was a devout indie kid, and their brand of smiley acid face cheesy quaver rave pop was … Continue reading Keith Flint 1969-2019
You get your money's worth out of races. Do you know how much it costs to enter the Brighton Marathon? Sixty-five quid! Why would you pay so much money for something and want it to be over quickly? And parkrun - okay, you're not paying for parkrun so you can't really get your money's worth, … Continue reading Five Reasons Why It Is Best To Be Slow
After I posted yet another "medal wanker selfie" to Facebook, my non-running friend Alexander asked somewhat incrediously what I did with all those medals. The answer to this question is that I hang them on my door handle for a while and then put them in a big plastic crate which I keep under my … Continue reading Medal Wanker
Today I am going to post about something which is, bizarrely, rather a contentious topic. Running with headphones. If you ask advice on the best headphones, or the best songs to run to, or how long you should make your half marathon playlist (two hours and fifty-four minutes, for the record), you are GUARANTEED to … Continue reading Running to Music
What did I tell you? I thought maybe going vegan had made me immune to colds because I hadn't had one since April 2018, but clearly not. I started coughing and sniffing a bit during yesterday's long run, but assumed it was just the cold air irritating my lungs. I felt quite exhausted in the … Continue reading Sick
This weekend's activities have been Things I Would Have Done Anyway - South Norwood parkrun and a RunThrough 10k in Crystal Palace - and finally I find myself without enough time to post some musings on running and mental health, although that may mean I will not have time to post about South Norwood parkrun … Continue reading RED: How Running Saved My Sanity
I was egg-scused (sorry) from parkrun this morning as I had to go to work. Meanwhile, the Unhappy Eggs parkrun drama raged on. Despite over a thousand comments mostly denouncing the partnership on the original post, parkrun HQ had no intention of backing down. They sent an email out to some concerned core team members … Continue reading parkrun egg-gate continues…
It has all kicked off on Facebook. parkrun have announced their new sponsor is a mass producer of eggs (I will not give them the publicity by linking them) who, like all mass producers of eggs, are well known for doing horrendous things to chickens (warning - link contains descriptions of animal cruelty - no pictures). … Continue reading The new parkrun sponsor
Running a 5k in 30 minutes is often seen as the holy grail for beginners and talent-deficient runners, and it's my big goal for the rest of the year. My current PB is 32:46, set in November 2017 on the running track, so it seems like something I can achieve if I focus on it … Continue reading A Weighty Issue
I have not a lot to say about this week's race as it was pretty much exactly the same as the last month's. It was significantly hotter, but also significantly less mudder so I am hoping those two factors cancelled each other out and my time (40:11, exactly a minute faster than last month) represents … Continue reading RunThrough Chase The Sun Wimbledon Common
A couple of days after this year's London Marathon (one week after I ran Brighton), a story doing the rounds on my running groups was causing widespread outrage. Jake Halliday, a sub 4 hour marathon runner who had raised nearly £50,000 for Bloodwise, had lost his running number somewhere near the end of the race, … Continue reading The Marathon Cheat
I have still done fuck all running since the marathon. I went out for a trial run round the block (less than 1km) on Wednesday and it felt fine at the time, but the second I stopped I felt like I'd been kicked in the shin and the pain didn't go until the next morning. … Continue reading My Time on the Injury Bench
A week on from the marathon, and I'm still perplexed as to why every single person I speak to doesn't want to hear about it in minute detail. I am telling them anyway, including random people I never normally speak to at work, the scary HIIT instructor at the gym and absolutely anyone I interact … Continue reading Post Marathon Delerium
I loved the Brighton Marathon. And I will never, ever do it again. "Oh, everyone says that," say my veteran marathoner friends. "I said that when I finished my first, and look, here I am on marathon number 59!" But I actually think that (barring some kind of lottery win where I can give up … Continue reading Why I Won’t Run Another Marathon
Running is like drinking alcohol. For a start, they are both things I enjoy. There is a certain irony to this statement, as since I started marathon training I have hardly drunk any alcohol at all. But examine the evidence: Running 5km is like a tasty pint of beer. You can do it in your … Continue reading Running is like…
Something yesterday reminded me that after my Dublin Marathon 2016 fiasco, I made a bullet pointed list of things to remember for next time. I had a dig in my computer and found the following in a Word file entitled "Things I Learned From My First Marathon": Four gels is plenty. Any more will just … Continue reading Things I Learned From My First Marathon
Today Brighton Marathon Weekend posted a photo on their Facebook page of two suspiciously cheerful men named Sam and Rob approaching the Brighton Marathon finish line pushing a young girl in a wheelchair, with the caption "3 weeks to go! Are you ready?" Am I ready? Let's see. I suppose I am ready, a bit like … Continue reading Are You Ready?
I'll spare you a long entry on last night's Chase The Moon, as it's the fifth I've been to and this could get repetitive! I ran it slowly as a "recovery run", hence a time of 38:27. I didn't look at my watch for the whole race, and I made it my mission to get … Continue reading The Final Chase The Moon
A bit of a rant before I set off on today's run. As you may recall, I've suffered a bit with the weather lately, completing runs in minus eight wind chill, thick snow, driving wind and rain, and slippery ice. Yesterday was supposed to be my long run day and today my yoga day. However, … Continue reading A Rant
The snow has melted and daffodils are beginning to sprout in my garden. My running outfits this week have involved a vest and sunglasses and this pleases me greatly. Winter running has been officially been giving me the hump. For my last few runs it has been warm enough to walk to where I want … Continue reading Springy Thingies
After whingeing spectacularly on my blog after my Brighton Half disappointment, I continued to whinge on my private Facebook, and this attracted some interesting comments from my running and non-running friends. Why are times so important? Is it not enough just to run? Why should walking some of it feel like a failure? A half … Continue reading Finish Lines or Finish Times?
And I am terrified! Entering a half marathon with a 2:45 cut off didn't seem a problem in June 2016, when I'd just run a half in 2:35 and naively assumed that my times would continue to improve. A month later I had a stress fracture. I completed my next half marathon (the … Continue reading I am in Barcelona
This week marked six months since my last sports related injury. (We'll gloss over the time I trod on a sewing needle and needed surgery under general anaesthetic to get it out of my foot; I didn't tread on it whilst running so it doesn't count). Up until that point it was one injury after … Continue reading Slow in the legs, not in the head
There are many skills which you need to train for a marathon: bloody mindedness, a low pain threshold, map reading, a disregard for your social life, perhaps even being good at running. I have reached the conclusion, though, that time management and schedule juggling is the most important of them all. I used to think … Continue reading How Not To Train For A Marathon
It's official. I've reached that stage. The stage where you aren't going to get any sense out of me until April 15th. The onset of Maranoia, which is a state of anxiety afflicting marathon runners in their latter stages of training, whereby they are constantly convinced they will become ill, injured or otherwise afflicted by … Continue reading Maranoia
I'm feeling like a Run Failure this week. First of all there was my disgrace at Highbury Fields. Then on New Year's Day I decided not go to Double Parkrun, or even Single Parkrun. Because I hardly ever go out drinking/partying these days, and spend a lot of time saying "I can't because I am … Continue reading Run Failure
2017 started very badly with my withdrawal from the Barcelona Half with two weeks to go. Having missed so much training through injury, I knew there was no way I could run it within the time limit, and I decided to cut my losses and defer until 2018. I write this post with six weeks … Continue reading 2017 in Running
"But you run marathons all the time" say my non-running friends, and it's a sentence that gets my back up more than it should. I've never run a marathon. I am training to run my one, my only, my first, my last marathon. Yes, I did complete the Dublin marathon last year. But I didn't run … Continue reading But You Run Marathons
Snow in London today (ok, about four flakes, but still) and absolutely freezing cold. I was very glad that I'd got my long run in yesterday and that today dwas a designated "rest day" (by "rest" I mean "12 hour work shift", there is no real rest in my life.) I am very fussy with … Continue reading I Hate Weather
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Better at writing than at running
Better at writing than at running
Better at writing than at running
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